Make a Plan of Action
This is mandatory for your success and happiness.
Let's compare your personal plan with a family disaster plan.
Your family may not be together when a disaster strikes so it is important to plan in advance:
how you will get to a safe place;
how you will contact one another;
how you will get back together;
and what you will do in different situations.
Apply the same principle to your personal and business planning and keep it current.
What if............happened.
Use your long-term/short-term plan.
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Eating Right to Feel Better
What we eat and drink can have a powerful effect on our mental clarity, focus, mood, and stress levels.
At its simplest, food is fuel.
Though our preferences regarding taste and texture can vary widely, we all rely on the foods we eat for energy.
Most people are aware that it is vital we consume a diverse assortment of foods if we aspire to maintain a state of physical well-being. However, the intimate connection between diet and our mental well-being is less understood.
Just as the nutritional components in food power the body, so too do they power the mind.
Some foods can impair cognitive functioning and sap our energy while others heighten our intellectual prowess and make us feel vigorous.
What we eat and drink can have a powerful effect on our ability to focus, mental clarity, mood, and stress levels.
Food allergies, which don't always manifest themselves in forms we recognize, can also play a significant role in the maintenance of mental health.
Thus, for most of us, even a simple change in diet can have a profoundly positive impact on our lives.
Taking the time to explore whether anxiety, muddled thoughts, or inexplicable tension can be linked to a food allergy or food sensitivity can empower you to treat your symptoms naturally.
The benefits of a healthier, more personalized diet are often felt immediately.
Sugar, saturated fats, wheat, and dairy products are frequently allergens and can stress the body.
For people that are allergic, consuming them can cause imbalances in the physical self that have a negative effect on the body's ability to nourish the brain.
Water, fiber, nuts, unprocessed seeds, raw fruits and vegetables, and vegetable proteins, on the other hand, support physical and mental functioning by providing those nutrients we do need without
additional substances we don't.
A balanced, natural diet can ease mood swings, panic attacks, anxiety, and mild depression. Intellectual clarity and agility is improved when the mind receives proper nourishment. Even those
individuals who are blessed with the ability to consume almost any food can benefit from a healthier and simpler diet. Since the mental and physical selves are closely bound to one another, we must
feed each the foods upon which they thrive.
Glad To Be Alive The Path To Adulthood – Healing The Pain Becoming The Adult Overcoming Loneliness – Part Two How To Overcome Loneliness How We End Up In Misery How To Deal With Loneliness Emotional Abuse Test Emotional Health – What Millions Still Don’t Know Emotional Insecurity Help You Have Emotion You Have Beliefs You Have Choice You Are Enough You Are Loved You Have A Heart
EMOTIONAL HEALTH –
EMOTIONAL HEALING –
EMOTION –
A fusion of thought and feeling that expands your consciousness.
Be very aware - Have a Plan of Action.
Nothing lasts forever.
Happiness is a choice that takes a lot of work.
15 LESSONS People Learn Too Late In Life
Listen with your heart NOT your mind.
Love!
Love everything, not just the good things, love the bad things too.
They are just experiences.
Love your depression for example and you will find it much easier to manage.
Dont fear anything, nothing good comes from fear.
Ground yourself by sitting under a tree, feel the wind in your face, swim in the ocean not a swimming pool. Walk barefoot on the grass etc...
Watch less TV. Speak good things about your body, your body hears and feels you.
So be kind to it and you will never get sick.
Laugh so much as you can about everything.
Money help but its not everything.
Simple is best.
Grow and eat your own food.
Just be kind and happy all the time.
This video reminded me to live life everyday with a PLAN:
- 7 Hard Things You Should Do for Yourself When You Don’t Feel Good Enough
- 10 Little Habits that Wreck Thousands of Lives One Day at a Time
- 1 Thing You Should Know About Our Uncertain Reality
- 9 Things it’s Not Too Late to Start Doing for Yourself
- An Open Letter to Those Who Have Lied to Impress Others
Check out many ideas about possible present and furure world events......
Stop Wishing For A Better Life, And Embrace The One You Have
The Grass Is Not Greener On The Other Side
“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” — Joseph Campbell
Let’s be honest here: Are you happy with your life or do you wish things were different?
For example, how would someone else evaluate your life?
Would they make adjustments or give you a stamp of approval?
Sometimes, we allow our negative emotions to get in the way of what life is trying to tell us.
We might see our friends or those on Instagram living wonderful lives and wish ours was the same.
Though we are not looking at things objectively but judging them on appearances.
No matter how successful, rich or happy you are, there will always be challenges and no one is immune from them.
Does it make sense that wishing for a better life doesn’t bring it into existence?
It requires picking apart what is not working and attending to those details consistently.
It’s no secret, everyone wants a better life.
But as you may or may not know, the grass is rarely greener on the other side.
It may appear that way but as soon as you attract better circumstances there will be new problems and challenges to overcome.
For example, those who are single lament their situation and want to be in an intimate relationship, to compensate for being uncoupled.
However, some are disheartened when the relationship doesn’t meet their expectations and soon they wish they were single once more.
The same is true with money.
When we’re struggling financially, we wish for an endless supply of money, however, if we become financially successful, there are other challenges that arise.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting we shouldn’t become financially free.
Though we ought to develop the right mindset irrespective of whether we are rich or poor, single or in a relationship, we will be happy nonetheless.
How do you feel about this?
Can you learn to be happy with your current circumstances knowing your life is a work in progress?
Work Through Your Problems
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.” — Lao Tzu
The key is to understand that life is constantly evolving.
Sometimes we will experience difficulties, pain, and struggles, while other times we will experience joy, elation, and success.
Winston Churchill said it perfectly: “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” He knew that to succeed, we mustn’t lose enthusiasm despite our difficulties. Challenges help us sharpen the saw of our character.
Whilst it may not be clear to us at the time, our pain and troubles can help us get clear on living the life we dreamed of.
I have encountered many challenges throughout my life.
There were moments when I thought I was doomed for failure.
Not that I didn’t want to succeed, though every time I tried,
I failed miserably.
I thought life was against me and I compared myself to others who were succeeding.
But those lessons contributed to my personal development.
What you believe to be deleterious may be the greatest thing for your personal growth. It is said: The obstacle is the way.
Is this making sense?
Can you appreciate what happens outside of you reflects what is taking place within you?
I’m certain you have many questions brewing inside your mind.
I invite you to write them down in a journal if you use one.
If you don’t, it would be a good time to start because journaling is an effective way to observe the theme of your life.
This is the first thing I recommend to new coaching clients when we work together.
Journaling is a powerful tool to become aware of our thoughts and work through our difficulties.
It requires observing what is not working in your life and coming up with ways to overcome those challenges.
You literally become better at working through solutions instead of falling into despair.
Even if we like to compare ourselves to others, we realize it is futile because the assessment is unproductive.
We ought to become our own motivators, counselors if we wish to conquer our challenges.
As we work through our problems, life will not seem as bleak as we think.
It only looks that way because we get stuck in a certain way of living and can’t find our way out.
We are like mice in a lab experiment, spinning on a never-ending wheel with no exit.
The keys are in your hand and they lie in your ability to find solutions to your problems.
With this in mind, I’d like you to take one pressing issue in your life and journal five to eight solutions.
They might not look impressive at first glance, however, revisit them over the coming days and narrow them down to three. When you are satisfied, pick one and act on it.
Note in your journal whether it helps you or if it requires more steps.
It is when we stop wishing for a better life and embrace the one we are given, that we appreciate a better life that has been staring us in the face all along.
Call To Action
Do you want to lead a remarkable life?
Have you had enough of not achieving the success you deserve?
If so, download your FREE copy of my comprehensive e-Book NAVIGATE LIFE now, and start your amazing journey of greatness today!
How to Find Inner Peace and Tranquility By Practicing Detachment
Learn to let go.
Remember when you were a little kid and you used to dangle something out of the backseat window?
There was a certain thrill that came with holding the object close enough so that it didn’t fly into the wind, but also letting the grip be loose enough so there was the possibility it flew out the window.
These days, I treat my life like these moments I had as a kid.
Sometimes, in life, gripping onto something, or someone, too hard, creates a bunch of unnecessary anxiety in your life. In general, trying to keep too close of a grip over a life you ultimately can’t control, can keep you too rigid.
A quality life comes from both openness and detachment.
You’re open to having certain experiences, things, and people in your life.
But, you need nothing.
The things you want don’t own you.
You appreciate certain things and people, but you loosen up the grip just enough for the possibility of them to fly into the wind. You don’t own anyone, or anything, really. So stop trying.
Live the life you want to live without needing it to turn out exactly the want you want it to.
Become a Whole Person to Remove This Attachment
“True love is free of fear and characterized by non–attachment.” Dr David Hawkins
I once held a woman hostage.
She escaped once, but I caught her.
I set her free once, then I hunted her down again.
Finally, she escaped for good.
And both of us are in a much better place because of it.
I knew pretty early on in my relationship that we weren’t meant to be together, but I was attached. So was she.
We developed an extremely co-dependent relationship — the break-up, makeup, break-up, and makeup again. None of us wanted to be in it, but we needed to be in it, ya know?
These days, I hold no one hostage when it comes to relationships.
If we’re together, I want you to stay.
But the minute I can sense you no longer want to be there, I won’t stand in your way.
I don’t believe in finding your “other half.”
Two whole people can meet and the sum can become greater than the parts, but it’s never healthy to be in a position where need something to work.
This doesn’t mean you should become a commitment-phobe.
It means to stop holding onto shit when you know it’s not working.
Deep down, we all know.
We know when we’re not as into them as they are us and they’d be better off with someone else.
We know when the situation is reversed.
We know when we’re clinging to someone to avoid being lonely.
We know when we’re growing apart. We know when it’s worth working to fix and we know when it isn’t.
Once you know it’s time to pull the trigger, pull it.
It’s always better to do it sooner than later.
Stop Being Stingy
“You need to change your attitude towards money. Those who horde money never enjoy life. Savers live shit lives. And you only live once.” Andrew Tate
“You’re going to leave that much?!”
I get the same reaction when I’m out with friends or on a date.
I leave big tips.
I’m not trying to show off either.
I used to deliver pizzas and I liked getting big tips, so I return the favor in kind. Also tipping generously helps me rid myself of my attachment to money.
I’ve seen several suggestions to re-wire your attachment to money:
- Make an uncomfortably large donation
- Once a month, go all out on an extravagant experience even if you’re broke
- Tip the entire bill
Money tends to flow to people who take it less seriously.
They work hard for money, yes, but they find creative ways to do it.
Ways where they know it’ll keep coming to them instead of having to grind themselves to the bone for it.
Think about it, some people work really really hard, but their attachment to money keeps them from ever having it.
They’re scared to lose it so they never take risks like investing or funding a business.
Money likes people an abundance mindset.
The ones who see money as scarce never seem to have enough of it.
You have to make a budget and it’s good to be wise with your money, but if you cling to it too tight, you create this weird frugal energy that will keep you stuck in a financial box.
Don’t Become a Slave to the Fruits of Your Labor
“You are not your job, you’re not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You’re not the contents of your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis.” — Chuck Palahniuk
So let’s say you start to have an abundant mindset with money and start making more of it.
Don’t turn around and create a prison with that money from the things you spend it on.
Materialism is this weird trap we’re all caught up in.
We all want nice things.
It’s okay to have nice things.
But it’s very easy for the things you own to end up owning you.
I used to live in a shitty rat-infested apartment.
Now I live in a nice townhome.
I used to drive a beater I bought from a car auction for $2,500. Now I drive a brand new car.
I used to dress like a scrub and now I have a closet full of outfits.
Yes, it’s nice.
It’s objectively better to have a leveled-up situation.
But I try to remind myself that there isn’t a certain point where I can stop:
The hardest but most important financial skill is getting the goalpost to stop moving. — Morgan Housel
It’s nice to have nice things, but these things don’t matter either.
They don’t make me a better person than anything else.
They don’t really change the way I feel inside.
Only I can do that.
Enjoy nice things, but don’t use them to fill a void because that void is a black hole that will swallow everything you throw inside of it.
These days, I look at money mostly as a tool to give me the time and freedom to enjoy life. I walk around malls now and don’t really want anything.
Money gives me peace.
Let it give you peace.
Fuck the Joneses.
Kill Your (Former) Self
“Becoming psychologically flexible is key to personal transformation, not over attaching to your current identity or perspectives. Becoming insatiably committed to a future purpose and embracing emotions rather than avoiding them is how radical change occurs.” — Benjamin Hardy
As cliche as it sounds, you can literally just wake up one day and decide you want to be someone else.
Easier said than done, obviously, but you don’t owe your past self anything.
You don’t have to cling to it just because you’ve lived a certain way for a long time.
Maybe you’re not shy.
Just start talking to people.
Maybe you’re not the person who never finishes anything. Just find the right project.
Maybe you’re not weak.
Start standing up for yourself.
People love to argue for their own limitations.
I see it all the time.
“But you don’t understand Ayo!”
No, I do. You don’t. You’re too attached to yourself.
You think you’re this person with this certain personality.
Your personality is formed by your DNA a bunch of chance experiences — variables that could’ve flipped an entirely different way.
You can’t change your DNA, but you don’t have to let it define you.
You can create a whole new set of experiences and variables that can turn you into somebody new.
But you have to let your old self go.
I know it’s scary.
I know it feels like death.
It is death.
If you kill your past self, you get to live many lives in one life.
You’re allowed to pivot at any time and you’re never beholden to who you once were.
You’ll Always Care, But It Doesn’t Matter
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Elanor Roosevelt
There’s one prison that keeps us from ever truly changing our lives.
Our biggest attachment.
We’re too attached to the opinions of other people.
Your attachment to what others think keeps you from risking rejection and embarrassment.
It makes you create a facade instead of being who you really are.
Instead of moving through life freely, you’re constantly walking on eggshells.
How do you fix this?
I’ll let you know when I’ve figured that out.
I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m always going to care what people think about me.
I stopped waiting for that point where I’ll never care to do the things I want to do with my life.
It works that way with a lot of emotions.
You try to repress them instead of just allowing yourself to feel them.
If you’re anxious, be anxious.
If you’re scared be scared.
They are just feelings.
I’ve been rejected and embarrassed.
It sucks, but the feeling fades quickly.
I’ve rubbed people the wrong way by being myself, but that means they were never a good fit in the first place.
I care what you think about my writing, else I’d keep it all in a journal.
But I’m not going to let a negative comment or two keep me from sharing my thoughts with the world.
We’re just two people looking at a screen.
No big deal.
If you want to read, read.
If not, don’t.
The globe will keep on spinning.
It’ll keep spinning and all the while the people on it are moving so fast and are so preoccupied with themselves they don’t even care about what you’re doing anyway.
Remember that.
How To Hack Your Brain Into Doing Whatever You Want.
Just understand the game rules
We don’t do things randomly.
There’s a reason behind every action we take, a brain process that has determined what’s our next move.
Lucky you, this process isn’t a secret, and you can learn how to trigger it whenever you want.
I’m going to show you how to put yourself in the driver’s seat of your life.
Your actions won’t be an accident or irregular anymore.
You’ll have the power to choose.
The techniques I’m going to show you have one secret: They are almost effortless.
Once you have adopted them, your body will beg you to do them.
I think this is the only possible way if we want to stick to a plan for the long haul.
You can’t be fighting against yourself each morning to wake up early or to do anything else.
You’ll get angry, emotionally burned, and you won’t last long.
That’s all for promises today. Let’s get down to business!
“You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” — Marcus Aurelius.
So far, I’ve found 2 different techniques that work exceptionally well.
I’m going to explain the basis of each one and how to use it.
Luckily, at the end of this article, you’ll count on 2 powerful weapons to craft your perfect day.
I’ve seen people use one, or all of them at the same time.
It’s really a personal thing, finding out what works for you.
Maybe you stick to one and don’t even consider the other, or you require power from them all.
Let’s begin with the first one: Personality.
1. The power of the personality
When we grow up, our brain learns about thousands of different behaviors, including those from our parents, teachers, friends, etc.
We need to feel identified with a personality to know what to do in each situation. We need organization and order in the way we behave. So we adopt the character that applies more influence on us (usually our parents).
Imagine someone hitting you in the face for no reason.
Is your brain identified with aggressiveness, kindness…what do you consider yourself?
The answer will tell you how your reaction to the punch will be.
If your personality is aggressive, and you were raised into thinking you were aggressive, your response will not be the same as a person who considers himself extremely polite and peaceful.
People are inseparable from who they think they are, and they will try to evade or eliminate anything that proves them wrong.
Have you ever been in a conversation when the other person won’t agree with you even when you got all the facts by your side?
Consider if he, changing his opinion, would have left their personality behind.
It happened
I usually promote my articles on Reddit, especially in communities that I know can help the users.
So one of the last articles was named “You are not an introvert, and I’ll show you why.” In what community did I post it?
Yes, in the “Introvert” community, where 287k members who consider themselves introverts gather together.
Basically, I was making a direct attack on their personality, jeopardizing who they were. And they did defend.
They weren’t going to let someone even to question who they were.
So, meanwhile, I was receiving positive and encouraging comments in other Reddit communities (5 or 6) where I had posted this same article.
I’ll show you what the comments were from the “Introverts” community:
So, what’s the catch?
Listen carefully:
If you allocate your desired behavior right into your personality, your body and mind will fight to maintain it that way.
For example, Cristiano Ronaldo sees himself as a top athlete and a hard worker.
It’s part of his personality, so he will work out because he needs to do it.
Training is part of who he is!
He doesn’t have the guts to call himself a hard worker and then don’t do sh*t.
Want to do sport?
Consider yourself an athlete.
Buy sports stuff, follow sports people on Instagram, tell your friends you’ve been doing sport for a month straight (it doesn’t have to be true).
Remember yourself who you have become now, do the things that a person with that character would do, and sooner or later, it would be ingrained into your body harder than a root in the soil.
The trick here is to give yourself reasons why you are an athlete, an intelligent person, an early bird, or whatever. And if you don’t have any, create them and feel identified with them.
At one point, your body won’t accept any behavior different than the desired one, that is one integrated deep into you.
2. I’m a ruthless believer
It’s not reality that shapes us, but the lens through which we view the world that shapes our reality — Shawn Achor.
What we honestly believe, comes true, at least for us.
Okay, I can’t say this without looking like a Mr. Wonderful employee.
But it is so true.
Everyone has a set of beliefs, and they see their world through that lenses.
I’ll start with an exaggerated example:
A 50-year-old guy saw his father living until his 90’s without doing any exercise whatsoever.
Because of this, he has a strong belief that doing sport to live longer is just bullsh*t.
He lives with that view of the world, which affects his actions because he will not even consider entering a gym.
One day he has a heart attack, and his doctor tells him that if he doesn’t exercise, he will die before the new year.
His old belief is completely destroyed, and there’s a new one: Exercise is necessary to survive.
He spent the rest of his life exercising because of that belief, doesn’t matter if the doctor was wrong or right.
After all, he lives in the same world before and after the heart attack.
But he saw things differently, he believed in entirely opposite things. And that made him move.
You can believe anything you want, anything that empowers you.
A few months ago, I needed to wake up really early to finish all my tasks before 5:00 PM so that I could go to the QA class I had just enrolled in.
There was no way I could be up before 10 AM, and I needed to be on my feet at least 4 hours before that.
So one way or another, I had to believe one of these:
- If I don’t do it, something terrible will happen.
- If I do it, something very good will happen.
Going to the QA class just wasn’t enough motivation, so I started looking for reasons to force my brain into believing that doing it would be extremely beneficial.
If you search, you eventually find.
So I found 10+ reasons on google on why to wake up early.
I discovered so many good things about it that my brain couldn’t live without all that benefit!
I also looked for the awaking time of some of my idols to encourage myself even more.
Now I knew a lot of benefits that I didn’t know (feeling more awake, actually a contradiction, more silence, better wifi, time to relax and do everything at a normal pace), and I felt like I was waking up at the same time of people that actually changed the world (not that I will, but everything helps).
So at this point, I had a new belief:
I couldn’t live without the benefits of being an early bird. So long after I finished that QA class, I still wake up at 6 AM no matter when or where.
Don’t hesitate to put these two behavior monsters in action, and make them work for you.
You’ll need to put a little effort at the start, but soon you realize that they are carrying you by themselves.
Consider what distinguishes a process
from a outcome:
As you probably know - when we set out to manifest our desires, we typically focus on a particular outcome:
[+] A lucrative career...
[+] A fulfilling relationship...
[+] An influx of a certain amount of money...
[+] A physical or emotional healing...
[+] Etc.
That's why you always hear you need to "visualize what you want" and "allow it to happen."
But when for some reason it doesn't happen, we wonder:
"What's wrong?" ... "I'm doing everything I'm supposed to do!"
Guess what:
It's often our own relentless focus on our desired "outcome" that keeps us out of the mind state that would actually facilitate its manifesting process!
Let me explain...
===============================
** The Mind State You Need To
Effectively Manifest Your Visions: **
===============================
The instructions we usually get can sometimes feel a little contradictory:
[+] One the one hand, we're told to "let go," "not interfere with the self-organizing power of the universe," and "allow our envisioned outcome to manifest"...
[+] On the other hand, we're told that it doesn't happen by itself, and we do need to "take inspired action" towards it...
So which is it?
"Take action" or "let go?"
The answer is a paradoxical combination between the two - a state that's best described as "active intention without striving."
And to embody it, we need to prioritize 'process' over 'outcome'…
========================
** ‘Process’ vs. ‘Outcome’ **
========================
Consider what distinguishes a process from a outcome:
[+] An outcome reflects a static state that doesn’t exist yet.
[+] A process reflects a dynamic state that’s currently taking place.
Now consider the difference on your energy when you let your overall disposition be determined by either of these:
[+] When you hang up your focus solely on a specific outcome or accomplishment, your overall mindset will be shaped by the notion of "I’ll be happy when"…
... which is another way of saying "I'm not happy as long as"… In other words:
-- You're shaping your current state in the 'now' as being in pursuit of an outcome that doesn't exist yet... probably hoping it will relieve you of some current problem or discomfort.
-- As life reflects the energy you bring to the table, this risks the emergence of a reality that not only emphasizes your discontent... but also puts you "forever in pursuit" - i.e. you never manifest your desired outcome.
While larger outcomes have their place in setting our overall direction and measuring our progress...
... much more effective for shaping your energy on a more continuous basis is to embody a 'process'-orientation…
[+] When you hang up your focus primarily on specific kinds of process, your overall mindset will be shaped by the energy you choose to actively bring to the table:
-- You continuously, deliberately and actively engage in the attitudes and behaviors that are likely to bring about the kinds of outcomes you seek to manifest as a by-product.
-- And as life reflects the energy you bring to the table, this allows for your desired outcomes to naturally emerge as a matter of course.
It's important to see that...
====================================
** "Process" Is The More NATURAL Way: **
====================================
As the ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus already realized:
"All things flow."
Everything in life is constantly in motion and changes all the time:
[+] No situation is ever truly solid or fixed - not even you or your problems.
[+] Life is constantly in flux, and its energy field constantly morphing.
[+] Living is moving.
In alignment with that understanding:
Whereas a relentless outcome-focus often feels like 'swimming up against the stream'... surrendering to a process-focus quickly goes on to feel more like 'going with the flow.'
That's why in the "pursuit" of your desires, it's best to primarily take on a process orientation that's focused on being, experiencing and activating a particular state in the ever-evolving moment of 'now'...
(... instead of letting it be defined by a pursuit of something that's still by definition out of reach...)
As a result:
[+] You "let go," while actively investing yourself in the process...
[+] You're doing it without forcing it...
[+] And your "doing" will shape your "being," while your "being" will shape your "doing"...
That's what consistently forges an "active intention"... "without striving."
And you'll see your external world adjust itself naturally and accordingly to match your new, ongoing energy broadcast.
Hope that helps!
Talk soon,
-Henk
P.S. Your brain and mind can have a hard time coping with this notion... because for them, the paradoxical concepts of "process vs. outcome" and "taking action vs. letting go" can't go hand in hand.
To your brain and mind, things are either "black" or "white:"
[+] When you're in a productive flow, the mind states:
"There you go - life is energy, and I'm in motion. This is great!"
[+] Then when things seem to come to a halt and a problem inevitably comes up, it thinks it must readjust its definition:
"See - life is solid, and I'm a fixed and finite individual after all. This sucks!"
[+] And only when things start moving again, it feels pressured to change the definition back to "flow."
Your mind is stubborn in its habit of doing this - it wants you and life to be just one way... and not broaden itself enough to experience the whole dualistic nature of life and yourself:
Whenever things stall, it says: "Something is wrong... I'm wrong... I have a problem... I don't like this... I must control this change."
It then generates fear and anxiety, and needless disturbance ensues.
That's why in the process of manifesting your desires, it's much more natural and effective to not rely on your mind so much... but more on your heart:
What Do Most People Regret At The End Of Their Life?
My conversations with patients near the end of their lives.
We crucify ourselves between two thieves: regret for yesterday and fear of tomorrow.
Fulton Oursler
I have been fortunate enough to work with some amazing people in my career.
I don’t mean nurses; I am referring to my patients.
I have been a nurse for 16 years.
Working in intensive care and medical-surgical units.
I spent a lot of time with my patients and enjoyed having deep meaningful conversations in critical times of their lives.
Many of them would tell me all their friends have died and their families do not talk to them.
They were seen as either a “burden or old”.
This broke my heart, plus I loved to ask them all kinds of questions about their lives.
It was a walk down memory lane for them and for me it was knowledge.
We take the elderly for granted in our society when we should honor them.
They have so much knowledge.
Believe me — I’ve done very good stuff and very crazy stuff, and I don’t regret the crazy stuff. Jean-Claude Van Damme
What do you regret most in your life and what would you do differently if you had the chance?
Often in my life, I have been at a crossroads.
I want a new job, or to change areas in the hospital.
Travel the world, how can I do this, how do I know which decision is right?
So I would ask my patients these questions.
I was happy to get advice on issues that I was having in my life.
It was almost like free therapy.
Take a minute and sit with an older person, ask them for their advice.
I guarantee you it will help you out.
I have had patients tell me they regretted having kids!
I was at a critical stage in my life, and I was conflicted should I have kids, even though I don’t want them.
Thinking I was broken because I did not want them.
I never expected the answers I received.
Most of them said kids were the biggest mistake of my life, yea I love them, but they did not better my life.
Now they don’t talk to me, I am a burden to them or they were the opposite and said the kids don’t leave me alone.
They think I can do nothing on my own.
The resounding answer was you need to be 100% certain you want them.
If you are on the fence, do not have them because you feel obligated.
Patients regretted not doing what they wanted with their life.
They lived their life for someone else.
Whether it was their spouse, their children, or their parents.
A lot of the women said they wished they stood up and divorced their husbands, but it was the 50s and life was different.
They said never settle.
Do not let anyone tell you that you can’t do something.
Do it anyway and learn from your own mistakes.
They regretted staying in careers that they did not enjoy instead of chasing their dreams when they had the chance.
Some wanted to pursue different careers.
Their family would tell them that is not a good decision.
Their friends would not support them and tell them they would fail.
So they never took the new job and stayed in a career they hated until they retired.
These were always my bitter old man patients and a tough nut to crack, but I have my ways and ended up being my favorite patients.
Live a life that you want, because it will work out, or not, you have to try.
If you want to change your career, do it.
Do not wait, because there might never be a tomorrow.
A lot of them said they woke up one day, and they were old and dying.
Never wait to do what you want because that day may never come.
When I was deciding to travel, I was a mess.
Should I quit my job, should I leave my family and friends.
Is it going to be the biggest mistake in my life?
So I did as I always did.
I talked to those who are wiser and have lived-my patients.
I met this guy who told me about his travels to Japan and living in Asia teaching English for 15 years. He said it was the best experience of his life and he never regretted choosing differently.
He said his family thought he was crazy, but he did it anyway.
He said you are a nurse.
You will always have a job, you have nothing to lose.
I have also had many other patients tell me this. I was obsessed with living my dream for about 5 years before I did it.
When I talked to my friends and family, it was a resounding, Sara you have lost your mind.
Why would you leave a good job, and your friends and family to traipse around the world?
I said because I want to.
If you do not do it now you never will and that is the one thing you will regret.
You will not regret putting your career on pause.
You will gain more from traveling seeing the world.
They spoke from experience.
I met women traveling in their 50–60–70’s who say the only regret in life was not doing it sooner.
Life is not about money, fame, or success.
Life is about experiences.
I don’t care if your dream is to go to Niagara Falls or Iguazu Falls.
Do not put off what you want to do, because what if?
What if you die tomorrow?
What if you don’t die and are 98 years old and the only thing in life you regret is not doing what you want?
I know what you are thinking.
Not everyone can just do whatever they want at all times.
You are correct in this if you believe it.
I believe I can do whatever I want and it will always work out.
Why?
Because it has always worked out for me.
It may not have been the way I imagined or what I wanted but it is better.
It might be what I need, instead of want.
Life has a way of changing and redirecting when you follow your genuine desires.
Your intuition, your gut, that feeling that just does not go away.
Would you rather try something and fail or never try to and wonder?
I would rather try to and fail than to wonder what if?
My life has not been the easiest, but that was my life path.
I have overcome so many hardships and I would never change it.
I like who I am.
The struggled that came with living are worth it.
These struggles have strengthened me today.
Do not put off something because what if.
If there is something that you want to do, make it happen.
Regret is the worst feeling in the world.
These are not my words, but the words of 100’s of patients that I have taken care of.
One last regret from many patients is they regret not forgiving.
They regret staying angry and ruining friendships and relationships over pettiness.
Sometimes the ego gets in the way and we can not get past it. Forgiveness and gratitude are the ways forward.
Do not take these above regrets to your grave.
I have never regretted my decision to quit a 6 figure salary to travel the world, I would choose it again and again if I had to decide.
So what are you putting off for tomorrow?
Will tomorrow ever come?
Feeling under the Weather
Doing our difficult emotional cleansing can take a toll on us and make us feel run down, but this too will pass.
At times when we are detoxing our bodies, or going through the ascension process, we experience aches in our bodies and manifest flu like symptoms.
We may find ourselves feeling fatigued and even sad, as if we might be coming down with something. This is a natural part of any cleansing process and commonly accompanies deep inner-work.
As we are called to examine our emotions and our beliefs, which often prompts deep inner-changes as well as external shifts, our bodies grow tired.
Feeling under the weather is the way they let us know that it's time to take a break.
It's best to be easy on ourselves at times like these and not to keep pushing forward.
Learning to listen to and honor our bodies is part of the process of becoming more conscious.
As soon as you notice you are not feeling well, make an effort to get extra sleep, whether by going to bed earlier than usual or working naps into your routine.
You can also support your body by eating as healthy as possible, drinking plenty of water and herbal teas, and taking vitamins. Vitamin C is especially galvanizing to the immune system.
Homeopathic remedies can also aid you in assisting your body in its time of rest and recovery.
Talking lovingly to yourself, and your body, will also help.
Beyond that, simply letting go of thinking and resting in the deep silence of your true self will speed your recovery.
In addition, you can always call upon your guides and angels, asking them to ease the symptoms.
It is natural to go through times of feeling under the weather, so there is no reason for you to worry. On the contrary, feel free to let go of worry and rest peacefully in the knowledge that this
too shall pass, leaving you stronger, healthier, and further along in your healing process.
"The Spice that Supports Your Body's Astonishing Immune System*"
This antioxidant may also maintain cholesterol levels already in the normal range, and slow down the signs of normal aging.*
You may already know I place a strong emphasis on eating as much unprocessed, organically grown food as possible for optimal health.
One frequently overlooked way to enhance and optimize health with organically grown food is the use of herbs and spices – unprocessed and organic, of course.
One amazing benefit of these herbs is that they’re very low in calories, while being dense in vitamins and minerals.
In the same vein, they’re thermogenic, meaning they naturally support your metabolism to help you burn calories.* You feel satisfied more easily, so you eat less.* Studies show that consuming certain herbs and spices before each meal can potentially reduce your caloric intake.*
Due to their nutrient-dense status, they promote your overall well-being with antioxidants more potent than many fruits and veggies.*
Herbs and spices promote health and well-being in your entire body, not just in a particular area.
This "whole person" approach is why I believe these spices and herbs can benefit you so greatly.
But I consider one particular spice the “granddaddy” of them all, because its benefits are so amazing and far-reaching.
These inspiring words remind us that the power to move forward in life lies within us.
Don't Waste Your Time and Health with Synthetically Processed Herbs and Spices
Just as it's important to select and consume wholesome, unprocessed organic foods, you should do the same with herbs and spices.
Avoid breezing down the spice aisle of your local grocery store to pick up any old herb or spice.
It is important to be very selective.
If the herb or spice you're looking for is processed or not organically grown, you risk missing out on their most potent active ingredients, which provide you with optimal benefits.
If the herb or spice isn't cultivated, harvested, produced, and packaged using certified organic processes, you could be robbed of its healthful active ingredients.
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Routines Are Habits With a Purpose. Mostly.
Routines are meant to make life easier. Mostly, they do. But what about some routines that destroy your productivity, stress you out, make you irritable and potentially ruin your day?
And more importantly, can you a) recognize these routines and b) change them?
You might think you’re perfectly aware of all of your routines, but like any other habit, they can be hard to spot.
So how does your morning typically go? Hit the snooze button 2-3 times… stumble out of bed, turn on the coffee maker, hit the shower, go through at least 2 changes of clothes (okay, I do, anyway) before settling on the right one, slam a quick breakfast (if you’re lucky)… if you have kids, there’s the added fun of “Did you remember your homework? Do you have your gym clothes? Remember I can’t pick you up today so don’t forget to get on the bus! Do you have lunch money?” and other morning delights – usually accompanied by stress on both the parents’ and the kids’ ends. Rush out the door, pray you haven’t forgotten anything, battle traffic and get to work juuuuuuust in time, okay 5 minutes late, frazzled and already on edge, and then instead of tackling your inbox because your mind is scattered in a hundred directions, you answer emails for 30 minutes until you calm down.
Sound familiar? That’s a routine – not exactly a productive, peaceful routine, it’s more like a routine that was developed because of LACK of an established routine
The question is, does it make you happy? Does it set a positive tone for the day? Do you feel confident that everything has been attended to? Do you feel like you’re in control, or that you’re just along for this crazy ride?
Many of us drive with one foot on the brake and the other on the accelerator, not because that’s the most efficient, but because we’re used to it.
The good news is, because of the brain’s neuroplasticity (or ability to change), it is possible to let go of routines that make you crazy and establish routines that help you enjoy the day.
Here’s how. For this exercise, let’s just focus on ONE routine, and that’s the ever-important morning routine:
1. Think about your day-to-day life. Over 40% of your everyday activities are done a certain way – habitually – and therefore they have become part of your routine. Ask yourself, “Do I start the day off in a positive mood? Do I feel happy, confident and enthusiastic? When I get to work, do I feel like I can handle what today brings, or do I feel anxious and tense? When I deal with my family, are our interactions calm and happy, or rushed and tense?
2. Think about some elements of your morning routine that don’t work. Examples:
- hitting the snooze button
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rummaging through your closet for just the right outfit (half of which is in the laundry pile)
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rushing through breakfast (if you eat breakfast at all); choosing convenience foods instead of taking the time to prepare a healthy breakfast
-
snapping and yelling at your kids and/or spouse, or your partner
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feeling rushed and anxious about getting to work on time
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driving aggressively to make up for lost time, trying to get to work on time
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arriving at work tense and on-edge
3. What are your thoughts when you’re in this routine? How is your body responding (stress response, or with relaxation?)
4. Set the intention to change every element of your routine that causes stress. Write these down. Examples:
-
get up when the alarm rings; if you have kids, make them get up immediately too
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lay out clothes the night before (in fact, prepare as much as you can the night before)
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eat well – it takes very little time to prepare a healthy meal, you just have to decide to do it
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be kind, happy, cordial and helpful with your family; diffuse whatever stress is present with a cheerful attitude
5. Now implement the new routine. It will take about 2 months for it to become normal, so start with just one thing: for example, get up when the alarm rings, no matter what. That little bit of extra time will go a long way in making the morning less stressful. Once that habit is firmly in place, add another habit like preparing the night before.
6. If you notice that there is resistance to the new routine – as there probably will be before it’s a habit – just make yourself stick to it. You can say “cancel!” when an old thought or impulse threatens to take you back to your old ways, and remind yourself that this new habit feels much better
7. Finally, use meditation as a tool to help you destress. It may not be realistic to meditate in the morning, but how about just before bed, to help you sleep more soundly so you’re fresher in the morning? Just 15-30 minutes before you lie down to sleep will help set the tone for the next day.